Navigating the Bar

Updated: Apr 23, 2020

How to order drinks confidently and effectively every time

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.” -Humphrey Bogart

Here’s the situation... you’re at a bar with a few of your closest friends, their girlfriends, and your leading lady. The bar you’re in is packed with people and the bartender is running around like a chicken with his head cut off trying to tend to every hand raise, “hey buddy”, and the common “2 Miller Lites over here pal” that await him at every turn.

When your big moment comes and you finally get your chance to order from this creator of cocktails, who only has about .5 seconds of ear space before getting pulled in another direction, you botch the order, fumble your words, and end up with two Mai Tai's along with empty looks of disappointment from your lady and everyone else in the room.

Sound familiar? This common occurrence happens more frequently than you might think. When the sultan of steins approaches, you can't be thinking "Am I going with a beer to start?" or "Should I skip the foreplay and go straight for Basil Hayden's on the rocks?" Instead, when ordering drinks in a crowded room, you have to act incredibly fast or you run the risk of being skipped for appearing indecisive and unconfident in knowing what you want. Nobody wants that.

Therefore, when it comes to ordering a cocktail, here are a few of our favorites that you can request without the bartender and your friends looking at you like an asshole for what you’ve ordered:

  • Woodford on the Rocks

  • Hendricks & Tonic

  • Titos & Soda with a splash of lime

  • Old Fashioned with Bulleit Rye

When it comes to ordering beers, this decision can be a bit trickier as they have so many elements to consider, but the simple lagers are Miller Lite, Bud Lite, and Coors Lite. You also have a broad spectrum of blondes, stouts, and IPAs, but the simple answer is stick to what you know and leave the experimenting for liquor store visits. Period.

With that being said, we highly encourage experimentation when it comes to finding liquors and beers you'll enjoy. A great way to do this is by going to liquor stores that offer sampling before committing to a full bottle. Stores like Total Wine, Spec’s, and Goody Goody should have this option. If you’re more of a beer drinker, one great way to be adventurous is to take advantage of the mix & match 6 pack. Regardless of your approach to the next tailgate, pregame, or even dinner, always remember the golden rule… Stay thirsty my friends.

Cheers to you and stay suave Gentlemen.

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